There have been several stories recently on NPR about dying churches and how Americans don’t really care about religion anymore.
To which I respond Go Americans! Yes!
To which I respond, as a pastor, Go Americans! Yes!
I mean, let’s face it, how much good did all that old time religion actually do?
I went to Catholic church my whole young life and I don’t recall one single day or even hour spent in service to our community. We were never out in the world doing anything to help anyone. We got a little dressed up, sat in the awful pew, said the same frigging thing week after week, put money in the basket (huge emphasis there) then left.
I had no idea who the priests were or what the heck they did all week long. I didn’t care, either. The entire experience was fully disconnected from my actual life.
Many of the priests were, as it turns out, spending their days and nights grooming young boys to have sex with them or actually raping them. Taking them off to camps or retreats or into the back room and ruining their lives in ways too sickening to recount.
But there is a comprehensive database of the abusers with thousands of names that will break your heart and make you lose your breakfast. And that one is only the Catholics.
You want to read the most horrific thing you’ve ever read in your life, worse than any horror movie or terrible thing your mind could conjure? Here’s a piece about how the nuns at a foster home in Burlington, Vermont tortured, abused and killed children. It’s not an easy read, but it is the truth and truth deserves its day in the light, don’t you think?
There are so many of these stories out there now. And we wonder why the new generation doesn’t care about church? Seriously? We wonder why they don’t care about God or the stuffiest, most boring people on the planet, the clergy. We wonder why they don’t want to spend their precious Sunday morning sitting inside a room that was re-decorated in 1974? On a stiff and uncomfortable pew with a dusty copy of the Holy Bible staring at them, surrounded by windows that never open. They don’t want to sing hymns that speak of Jesus loving even us terrible sinners, they don’t want to hear yet another person tell them they’re not good enough?
Shocking.
I have no idea why church attendance was so high several decades ago. I don’t know if it could be attributed to a more compliant society. A certain sense of you have to do the right thing and going to church is the right thing.
Only, as it turns out most of the church leadership were hypocrites and criminals. So the turning away is actually healthy. It’s the right response.
It’s all unraveling and that is a very good thing. Things that aren’t working well are supposed to fade away and die, and in regards to churches, it’s been happening over a long period of time. If churchy folks didn’t see the writing on the wall ten years ago and figure it was time to try new things, then tough nugs and good riddance. All things that are not engaged in the vitality of life will eventually die. If you look carefully enough you’ll see that the thing: the person or the institution, was actually choosing death over life all along.
When I started at my first small church in a small town in Vermont almost ten years ago, it was dying. People asked me, what are you going to do to get people to come? And I would shrug my shoulders and say Be myself, tell the truth. If it resonates they’ll come back. If they like it enough they’ll tell their friends and maybe they’ll come, too.
Some churches invest in espresso machines and video projectors and I guess that’s okay. Maybe that works. But I think people who are stepping foot inside a church at all are just looking for authenticity. They just want to feel like what’s happening in there in some way reflects the life they’re living.
The being myself and telling the truth and also lots of times allowing myself to cry in front of everyone and get angry about things like school shootings worked pretty well. I also tried to undo some of the incredibly stuffy and overwhelming churchy decor and I engaged local musicians so we didn’t have to be bombarded with the oppressive sounds of an organ every week. In other words, I tried to open as many doors and windows as possible and let the light of modern day in. It worked. But only for so long because, in classic church style, there were plenty of people there, especially the ones making decisions, who didn’t want things to change. Didn’t want to put their limited resources into the places that would have made a difference. Instead of paying their pastor a livable wage, they dedicated their annual appeal haul to paving the parking lot.
And so that was the end of that. I left, they paved the parking lot, which I hear is now not being used much because … attendance has dwindled to practically nothing.
Fortunately the church I serve now, which was also on life-support when I got there, has a more open-hearted approach and folks are willing to try and fail at new ideas. It’s the only way a church is going to make it into the future: to let go of old nonsense and try on some new stuff. And then try again. And be willing to alienate some folks in the process.
We eliminated committees, which tend to be more like quicksand than … I’m not sure of the right descriptor, I just know that when you say the word committee most people remember they have elective surgery coming up. Committees suck. They suck the life out of every good idea that every happened. They waste time and resources. Committees give birth to sub-committees! Then you’re really wading in the world of inertia.
We created the idea of work groups that spring up when we need to get something done and that means we can get stuff done efficiently. We’ve kept the board small and streamlined and we let people do what they’re good at doing. Our Sunday mornings have turned into a lovefest of music and dogs barking, toddlers dancing.
If a church is going to make it into the future it has to start the process of undoing so many of the churchy things that were and are just plain dumb. And replace them with things that feel authentic, and that means not only the architecture of the place (get rid of the oppressive, uncomfortable, useless pews!), but also the ways the pastor engages, the kinds of songs that are sung, the way money is collected, the texts that are referenced, staffing, leadership, decision-making processes.
Holy heck, that’s everything!
Yes, that’s correct, every single thing about churches needs to be reconsidered. What a cool and fun project!
And worthy, too. Because even though Americans consider themselves to be non-religious and aren’t interested in the traditional church experience, humans will forever seek an authentic opportunity to engage in community and to ponder the big questions. No matter what happens, we are hardwired to keep seeking, keep grasping, keep trying, keep helping. And if a church isn’t willing to morph and evolve and toss all the old not-working nonsense onto the trash heap, it should die. Death is a good thing. Death makes space for the next new thing to be born.
We sure hope you can come if you’re in or around southern Vermont some Sunday morning.
xomo
They paved paradise, put up a parking lot.......
I do knot believe in a man-made God. Jesus was a teacher and spiritual leader to teach poeple how to embrace the poor and the downrtroden. Recently, the Cathold High School next to St. Peter's Church on Broadway, in Saratoga Springs, protested a buildining for the homeless that was separated by a playground and a metal fence. The Mayor, Ron Kim, had to find another building because of the Catholic High School parents protesting. Now what does that teach us about belief systems?