Hi.
I hope you’re warm wherever you are. They say it’s supposed to be minus 40 or something around that today, which seems impossible, but I probably won’t test that prediction.
So there is that pithy thing people say when someone dies: “they’re in a better place.”
Wait. It’s not pithy, right? I love that word and will try to slip it in any chance I get, but I don’t think it’s the right word in this case.
Saccharine.
Dumb.
Meaningless.
I understand what the person is trying to say and also what they’re trying to accomplish. They want to make the grieving person feel better and, I think, they’re probably hoping that the dead person has moved on to a better world. Heaven, I guess, maybe, is what most people think comes next.
A more accurate and appropriate choice of words would be they’re in a better condition.
We don’t actually go anywhere when we die, we just drop the body suit and exist in spirit, so we haven’t really left, we’ve just changed form.
The thing is that this place, this world, is actually really nice. If you look around, no matter where you are, you’ll find evidence of wonder and beauty. Outside you’ll hear nice sounds like wind or birds or waves or a river flowing. Trees are gorgeous and, at this very moment here the sky is ablaze with the rising sun, making it orange and yellow and about twelve different shades of pale blue. The white snow gives the ground a lovely cover and the bare branches of the trees are quite elegant. This place, our world, is amazing. In terms of a backdrop for a life, it’s hard to imagine something better.
But the people in it, the ways we treat each other, the kinds of nonsense we engage in each day, mentally, emotionally, spiritually … our fixation on the past and our troubles. Our unwillingness to help others, to be a little nicer, to stop wasting so much stuff and time … it’s the people here that aren’t so hot, not the place. When you think of the mountains and the ocean and the sky and the canyons, there couldn’t be a better place than this planet. But humans have a long, long way to go and leaving this embodied condition for a while, is, indeed, a nice break. It is better when one is in soul condition, free to wander, have some playful fun, focus on spiritual development.
Of course, not all spiritual entities are terrific and we don’t elevate immediately to wizened status the moment we die. It’s all a process and the conditions of our lives here are the opportunities we are given to do better. It’s all a classroom, school of life. Every day an opportunity to do improve, not repeat the same old same old.
A lot of people I know have died these past few months. That might be because I know a lot of old people; no matter, a bunch of folks I know are gone from here now. I miss them very much, but the tears I cry are for myself, not them. I feel sorry for myself, that I can’t hang out with them anymore. For them I’m happy. I see them soaring and playing, free from their creaky body, filled with aches and issues. Trips to the doctor seem to be the main thing old folks do. The maintenance after a lifetime of interventions and medications is usually pretty drawn-out and not really much fun. No one ever thinks about what life will be like in the last years when they’re having their third body part replacement or another stent put in. We are so darn good at prolonging life, but we’re terrible at figuring out how to live well at end-of-life. What we gain in quantity we lose in quality. So no, I don’t think that my dead friends are in a better place, they’re just in a better condition now, a more desirable state of being.
Try to think of it that way when someone you love dies or when someone you care about experiences the death of someone they love: they’re in the same place they’ve always been in: here, but they’re in a lot better shape than they were before they died.
Human being previously; spirit being now. So cool!
Love you all, thanks so much for being a reader. xomo
I do not see myself going anywhere after my body expires. I see myself as energy, a spirit, and energy never dies. It is a great mystery what will be. My wish would be to stay here where I can feel the wind, hear the birds, see the woods, lakes, hear gurgling brooks, see corn fields swaying. I want to continue being with nature. If that is my happy hunting ground I will be happy.
😊